We humans often fall prey to this common thought: “It’s all about me!” It may be in a self-conscious way, like when you walk into a room and think “everyone is looking at me.” Or, it may be in a self-judging way, that causes anxiety in the middle of the night; You lay awake recounting the day or week before and beat yourself up over something you said (or didn’t say), something you wore (or didn’t wear) or even how you reacted to something.
The truth is, nobody is thinking about you as much as your thinking about yourself. What Freedom!
This is true with your boss at work, too. Many bosses walk through their day with blinders on, entrenched in their own work load. Many boss’s management style is akin to a firefighter. They spend the day putting out fires (rather than preventing them) and can’t see anything but the problem in front of them. And then there are the bosses who are simply preoccupied and absentminded.
One of my pet peeves is for an employee to seethe over some good work that I didn’t notice. Help a brother out! Now is the time to be your own cheerleader. Bosses like to stay abreast of new ideas, be informed and know who is going above and beyond the call of duty. Tell us how amazing you are rather than silently building resentment that affects your work and the people around you.
Most bosses hire a service to write their payroll and therefore don’t look at the pay schedule that often. Managing employees is only part of what the boss of a small business does. This leads me to offer advice on how to ask for a raise.
If you don’t work for a big company with a human resource department that has annual employee evaluation meetings, then occasionally ask your boss for a moment of his/her time. Take this opportunity to toot your own horn and get feedback from the person in charge. Inform your boss of any new work or processes you may have initiated or improved. Be receptive to constructive criticism. If it’s been a long time since you’ve had a raise, this is the time to mention that to him/her. Your boss has a lot to consider when doling out money, so don’t take it personally if he/she puts off your request. As I said earlier, “it’s not all about you.”
Remembering that you’re not the center of the world for anyone but yourself may make those middle of the night anxieties easier to bare and lead to forgiveness of other’s accidental inconsideration’s. And during the day, remembering that tip may prompt you to express your sane and worthy thoughts, not only to your boss but to others as well. He/she will appreciate the dialogue over a bad attitude any day.
